Hey Clarissa this is Eleanor. Can I get a quick WIP Audit for my blog?
Certainly ma’am, Do you want the full audit of shame package or the active wips audit?
uh,,, let’s go with just the active. I don’t think I can stand the audit of shame right now.
Certainly ma’am, An investigator will be out to your residence shortly,,,
Offical Report Findings
Active WIP Audit
When the investigator entered the residence all active knitting and crochet projects were found hanging from wall mounted hooks in individual project bags. The active spinning was found in a bin under the television, leading this investigator to believe that it may not be as ‘active’ as the knitter promised.
Project A) Halloween Themed Bag
The bag was very full when I opened it, too full to properly document. The knitting was removed and it was revealed to be a nearly complete pinwheel sweater.
Yarn: Madelinetosh Vintage in “Copper Penny”
Pattern: Pinwheel Sweater
Mods: Garter stitch substituted for Stockinette. Sweater is being knit flat and not in the round.
Needles: US 9 (5.5mm)
Project B) Spinning Bag
Lots of Fiber in this bag left to spin.
Fiber: Woolgatherings 100% BFL Top in a Blue/Purple/Teal colourway
Project C) Rose Bag
(under section 12.1 – an investigator cannot endanger themselves during an audit)
Yarn: String theory colorworks Resonance base in “Kopernik”
Pattern: Simple stockinette sock
Needles: 2.75 mm
Additional notes: shows signs of extensive frogging
Project E) Happy animal families in Red/White and Black
Yarn:Blue Moon Fiber Arts BFL sport in “Manly Yes… But I like it too”
Needles: US 8 (5.0mm)
Notes: the edge of the shawl is approximately 2/3 complete from the knitter’s project notes
My Reporting practices were closely monitored by a black feline. while I was auditing the spinning wip she attempted to eat the fiber. In case the knitter charges us with fiber neglect I documented the beast as closely as possible in a separate Feline Damage Form. I have enclosed some pictures below to aid in any follow up investigation:
At first the feline calmly watched…
Then it noticed the fiber…